Little Love Wishes

I don't think I have met anyone who truly desires to spend their lives alone.  People may feel called to be abstinent  or life circumstances like divorce or death loss may create experiences of loneliness   And some people unintentionally continually end up alone.  But I am inclined to believe that simply choosing to be alone-without any desires to connect with another human being-is rare.

We are human beings after all!  We long to feel a physical connection with someone else.  We have emotional urges and desires to connect intellectually, emotionally, spiritually.  We have physical urges.  We have sexual urges.  They can be primal, natural, and ever persistent if left unfulfilled (and even when completely satisfied).  

There is something about being face to face with someone, looking into their eyes, seeing their smile, feeling their warmth when you press your body against theirs.  It can be explained scientifically, psychologically, spiritually.  And what it comes down to is the fact that humans seek out and belong around other human beings.

Have you ever hugged someone so tightly and connected with them so greatly that after they leave, you can still smell their perfume or cologne and you can still imagine what it feels like to have them in your arms?

Have you ever been kissed so gently yet so passionately that just the thought of having the experience with them again sends chills up your spine and butterflies in your stomach?

Have you ever laughed so much with someone that your body aches and you still smile while remembering the feeling you shared?

Have you ever been so nervous, yet so excited to think of this person, see this person, be with this person, that it's hard to contain your goosebumps and permanent grin?

If so, you may find yourself smiling more often.  Your heart beat skips a little when you think of them.  You feel incredibly nervous and excited all at the same time.  You lose your breath just a little...

It may not be love. But we all want it and wish for it and hope it gets there soon.

More love wishes:

Finding someone who inspires you to be a better person.

Finding someone who accepts you for you.

Finding someone who treats you the way you deserve to be treated.

Finding someone who is loving and trustworthy.

Finding someone who is worthwhile.

Finding your soulmate.

Growing old with that someone.

Building dreams with that someone.

Raising a family with that someone.

Writing and living never ending love stories with that someone.

May all of your love stories and wishes come true! <3

xoxoxo Le Renee

Sponge-worthiness

Recently I have decided to start dating again.  I don't know exactly what I am looking for, but I am open to the experience.  I am constantly determining if the person I am connecting with is someone that I find to be interesting, intriguing, genuine, sweet, and potentially compatible with me.  Can I see a future with him?  Are my feelings about him worth it if I get hurt in the end?   After beginning to think about the possibility of dating someone again, I started really thinking about myself.  I spend all this time trying to determine if someone is right for me...but am I right for them?  What do I bring to a relationship, and is it enough?

We spend so much time while dating just trying to evaluate others, keeping our guards up or rushing right in.  Sometimes it's good to take a second and reflect on ourselves and check in with who we are and what we are really looking for.  Do we deserve more than what we are pursuing?  Or do we have some work to do?

Our Sponge-Worthiness

Think about these questions for yourself: What do I want in life?  What do I want in a potential partner?  Am I being honest with myself about what I need?  Am I able to acknowledge and accept my flaws? Do I understand where there are areas where I can grow?....Am I willing to grow and change?  

When I meet someone special, how will I recognize that they are special?  How will I know? Am I am able to share my heart with someone, love someone, be there for someone, grow with someone...Be inspired by someone and strive everyday to be the best me I can be?

These questions and thoughts are normal.  Doubts about the authenticity of the people we talk with, doubts about the possibility of ever finding the one, doubts about yourself and your self-worth...It's scary to put yourself out there!  What if it doesn't work?

It's important to notice when you begin having these thoughts so that you can change them into something that supports your needs, desires and dreams.   Remember, you can't get to where you are going if you don't keep going!  It's one thing to be appropriately guarded or hesitant to keep yourself protected in new relationships (I may or may not be guilty of this...(: )  It's another thing to become so hesitant and doubtful that you never go on that first or second date or that you never really put what you want into the relationship long-term, out of fear that you will be hurt.

The beauty about online dating is that, at first, there is a natural barrier between you and the rest of the world.  Use this opportunity to your advantage!  Step out of your comfort zone a little.  Take your time messaging potential matches so that you can make sure you say exactly what you mean to say.  Don't just settle for the first person who responds.  Be patient with the process and practice being the very best version of yourself that you can be.  Think about the movies Hitch and Housebunny.  Each leading character already had amazing qualities.  They just needed to do something a little different to position themselves for success.  Remember Carrie Mae and her unforgettable "...to do something mysterious" comment?  It was absolutely hysterical, and might have worked with the right guy.  But maybe our future dates don't need to see the fullness of our personalities until a few dates in...you know, after they are hooked! :)

Take the time, behind the monitor and keyboard, where you can edit, to build up your confidence and to understand more about who you are, what you want, and what it will take to get there.   Above all, have hope.  Albert Brenneman got his lady Allegra, and you too can end up with your match.  And you absolutely deserve the very best!!

Wherever you've been, whatever you've done, whatever you've been through, your future can be different, better, brighter.  Accept the past for what was, appreciate who you are now and work towards the future self you want to be!  You deserve love.  And the right person will find you to be very sponge-worthy!

You are you.  There is no one else in the world like you.  And you are the perfect match for someone else out there.  It's not easy and it can hurt, but after all, you have been there for everyone else.  Now, it's time for someone special to be there for you.  It will happen for you.  You just might have to save your sponges and try something a little different to notice when the right one comes your way.  <3

xoxox Le Renee

Pre-Dating Worries

Please be as cute as you were in that photo.

Please be as sweet as you were in your text.

Please be as patient as you were when we messaged.

Please be as honest as you were online.

Please be as intriguing as you were on the phone.

Please don't be a secret douche bag!!!

Please be respectful to my friends!

Please be as open as you were when you asked me out.

Please be as close to the person that I connected with behind the screen....In fact, please be better!

And after we meet, and connect, and meet again and again... please hug me, and hold me and make me smile.

Grow with me!  Don't tell me you are amazing....Show me you are amazing!

You don't have to be perfect by any means, just be you.  The real you!

And if you are fake and just trying to get laid, we will just add one more to the douche jar and call it a day.  :)

xoxoxo Le Renee